I was exercising with one of my older patients today and she started a conversation about the weather…which eventually turned to immigration and then of course to dating. The dating conversation is a popular favorite among the old ladies, second only to the terrible weather and immigration.
Old Indian (slightly whacked out) lady to me: “It wasn’t that cold outside today!”
Me: “Yeh! Its supposed to get warmer towards the end of the week.” I mumbled some other bullshit about rain, spring, slush and the weather network.
Indian lady: “So, have you heard anything from immigration?”
Indian lady: “Hmm…are you Indian?”
Indian lady: “Are you muslim?”
Indian lady: “Do you have a partner?”
Me: (partner?) “No.”
Indian lady: “Shouldn’t you be having one?”
Me: “I suppose”
Indian lady: “Have you tried shaadi.com? Its very effective.” (Quick glossary: shaadi.com = Indian matrimonial site committed to matching up doctors with engineers, engineers with lawyers and lawyers with doctors. I’m not a member only because I’m clearly in none of those professions and hence automatically rendered unmatchable)
Indian lady: “Do you want to marry my son? He’s single, has two Masters degrees and works in IT”
Indian lady: “Are you sure? Don’t you need your Immigration papers?” (well played, Indian lady. Well played)
Me: “How old is your son?”
Indian lady: “37.”
Indian lady: “He looks like Prince William”
Me: “No. Would you like a heat pack?”
Indian lady: “He makes a lot of money. And he looks like Prince William”
Indian lady: “I think you’re too picky”
It occured to me that I had just turned down a balding, 37 year old Indian guy working in IT who apparently looked like British royalty. I guess I actually am a little too picky.
Oh well…another one bites the dust.