Dating Epiphanies

I was exercising with one of my older patients today and she started a conversation about the weather…which eventually turned to immigration and then of course to dating. The dating conversation is a popular favorite among the old ladies, second only to the terrible weather and immigration. 

Old Indian (slightly whacked out) lady to me: “It wasn’t that cold outside today!”

Me: “Yeh! Its supposed to get warmer towards the end of the week.” I mumbled some other bullshit about rain, spring, slush and the weather network.

Indian lady: “So, have you heard anything from immigration?”

Me: “Nope”

Indian lady: “Hmm…are you Indian?”

Me: “Yes”.

Indian lady: “Are you muslim?”

Me: “No”

Indian lady: “Do you have a partner?”

Me: (partner?) “No.”

Indian lady: “Shouldn’t you be having one?”

Me: “I suppose”

Indian lady: “Have you tried Its very effective.” (Quick glossary: = Indian matrimonial site committed to matching up doctors with engineers, engineers with lawyers and lawyers with doctors. I’m not a  member only because I’m clearly in none of those professions and hence automatically rendered unmatchable)

Me: “No.”

Indian lady: “Do you want to marry my son? He’s single, has two Masters degrees and works in IT”

Me: “No”

Indian lady: “Are you sure? Don’t you need your Immigration papers?” (well played, Indian lady. Well played)

Me: “How old is your son?”

Indian lady: “37.”

Me: “No.”

Indian lady: “He looks like Prince William”

Me: “No. Would you like a heat pack?”

Indian lady: “He makes a lot of money. And he looks like Prince William”

Me: “No.”

Indian lady: “I think you’re too picky”

It occured to me that I had just turned down a balding, 37 year old Indian guy working in IT who apparently looked like British royalty. I guess I actually am a little too picky.

Oh well…another one bites the dust.


5 thoughts on “Dating Epiphanies

  1. Hahaha uhhh I wouldnt do that to you. His mother is a little out to lunch most of the time. You don’t want the crazy gene passed on to the kids. And by crazy I don’t mean Catricala crazy. I mean actually crazy.

  2. This post left me cracking! I loved it! My sister goes through this too. People keep pimping their sons with a suitcase full of college degrees and certifications on her. Sucks being an Indian girl! Especially a pretty one like you. Keep writing, for I love your posts!

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