Sizing up the Down

This past Monday, the much anticipated Double Down Sandwich made it’s calorific debut in Canada. In case you’ve been living under a rock..or in a cave…or in a cave under a rock and you haven’t heard of the Double Down, it is basically KFC’s new move to punch out their rival heavy weights of obesity like the Wendy’s Baconator, Burger King’s triple Whopper and the ever famous Big Mac.

The Double Down is a sandwich crime which contains double of everything that is bad for you. Two pieces of bacon and two slices of processed cheese sandwiched between two slabs of KFC style chicken breast.

Doubledown

I asked a number of people if they would be willing to try out the new Double Down. The negative response came as no surprise. In fact, there were even rumours that the Ontario Health ministry had not only given KFC’s salty new business tactic  a double thumbs down, they had also banned it from making it’s way up north.

What did come as a surprise though was that there were other fat and salty monsters on the market that didn’t get nearly as much bad press as the Double Death (as I fondly like to call it):

The Big Mac: The Big Mac looks angelic with its modest showing of 590 calories, 11 grams of fat and 1070 mg of sodium.

The Double Baconmonster: Wendys’ idea of a Double clearly puts the Double Death to shame. 980 calories, 63 grams of fat and 1830 mg of sodium.

The Triple Bypass: Burger King’s Triple Whopper boasts a whopping 123o calories, 82 grams of fat and 1590 mg of sodium. Triple YIKES!

And the Double Death: 540 calories, 32 grams of fat and 1380 mg of sodium.

Clearly, the bragging rights and the health ministry’s outrage should rightfully rest of the shoulders of the King.

So then why did the Double Death get so much bad press compared to it’s nasty friends? Well, if there is anything I learnt from wasting countless hours of my life on Perez Hilton.com and watching TMZ, it is that bad press is good press…or at the very least better than no press. The fact that junk food critics and the Health ministry went so ape-shiz over this made me curious to see what the hype was all about.

So this past Friday, in the name of research for this blog post, I took a friend and waited for 20 minutes in line at KFC which was a first for me because KFC never has line-ups. The asking price for this heartattack was $6.99, with the option of making it a combo for course.

The Verdict: Disappointment. I recieved similar views from other  brave souls that tried it.  I’m not really sure what I was expecting but you would think that something so bad for you would at least taste good. And then I realised what was missing. Bread.

KFC might be trying to keep it’s head above the water but I think their new floatation device is packing on too many bags of tasteless salt to keep them from sinking. You may be winning the battle, Double Death with your 20 minute line-ups but you will not win the North American war on good health. Big  Macs and baconators will always remain the weapon for choice for sobering nightclubbers, hobos and PMSing women wordwide.

Will you be trying the Double Down anytime soon? Have you tried it? What did you think?

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8 thoughts on “Sizing up the Down

  1. Yikes!

    The sandwich is really unecessary. I think all the boycotting is working because I’m pretty sure the DD is a desperate business tactic.

    And no, I don’t think there was a mass demand. Just KFC trying to be compatible with other crimes against the arteries.

    • YES! That was exactly what was missing. Bread or biscuit. And to make it more appropriate, put it between two biscuits. So gross.

      • I am full of disgust…and yet have a new found respect for you lol. I’m glad it was at least delicious. I felt cheated after the Double Down because it was gross and untasty.

  2. As a vegetarian I have no plans on trying it soon. But I did want to add, they probably skipped the bread not only as a marketing tool but also to save on calories. I am sure there are some KFC suits that get paid a lot of money to monitor the competition’s nutrition facts. Based on what you listed above, bread could have been the nail in the coffin for the double death.

    • Thats what I was thinking too. But really, what difference does 400 calories extra make anyway to comprmise on taste. As it stands, The Death between bread would still be less calories than the Triple Bypass and taste better too. I think they did it because no one has made a breadless sandwich…yet. Which would be a marketing stratergy at the end. Who cares about nutritional facts. It is assumed you throw out nutrition the moment you make a desicion to buy fast food.

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